I'm not sure when I decided to give it a go but once I started it was hard to stop. I decided to reduce and replace what little meals I was having with my E028 elemental drinks as I wasn't feeling like x2 a day when I was eating breakfast and dinner. It was a slippery slope to not eating at all.
It was recently figured out that my system has such a delayed transit that I literally feel like I'm digesting a meal for 48 hours. That means if I was to eat a large serving, like going out for dinner and ordering a normal main meal, its likely I wont feel like eating for a few days. I believe that is almost why I don't feel hunger. I was eating quite a high fibre breakfast that by the time I was ready to pass it my poor system was exhausting from shoveling it through my system and to be honest sometimes it was pretty brutal when i finally got to the end of the tunnel. Not much digesting happens which also isn't helpful or comfortable.
So when my truck full of Elementals arrived and I figured out I had nowhere really to store a 3 month supply, I decided to up my 2 to 3 a day and replace breakfast, lunch and dinner with them. In between I would continue to drink my normal and I've been adding 1-2 Hydralite ice blocks into the mix which helps with my POTS symptoms a lot.
First few days of getting used to feeling the hunger was ok as I had been on a restrictive diet before. I had also been stress eating Oat Milk chocolate in the evenings which had become a bit of a bad habit... but that didn't stop my body going from one extreme to the other, so what used to be chronic constipation was now chronic diarrhea. That wasn't really a problem as I work from home but did kind of limit the time I spent out of the house. I did almost feel like it was triggered by the consumption of the drinks, which seemed similar to Dumping Syndrome so just put it down to my body getting used to the drinks and that I just needed to ride it out.
It had affected my POTs, my energy levels, my weight and now was affecting my bowels. I persevered though knowing that it would be worth getting through the week and I never thought once I hit the end of week one that I would be feeling so damn good! That was the problem as you become addicted to that feeling, the one of restricting, as you have no pain, no reflux (well apart from that caused by the drinks and the chocolate of course).
Eating my first meal in a few weeks was when I tested positive for Covid this past week. I ate a small bowel of cereal, had my drink for lunch and then had brocolli, carrot and rice for dinner. Within a few hours I was already in pain and being my first 48hrs of Covid was hard to figure out if the chest pain and back pain I was experiencing was food or covid related? It takes me 4 days to 'process' a meal so its now Saturday after 2 days back on my drinks and I've passed a few more solid stools but biggest thing ive noticed is the reduction in stomach cramps... a more settled sleep and fatigue levels are no worse.
Where does this leave me with eating? Don't get me wrong, I REALLY miss food, healthy food...and like I said I'm still eating here and there with a bit (sometimes too much) chocolate but that cant continue due to the sugar content, which I've heard can be a significant trigger for Dumping.
My latest blood tests said everything looks perfect apart from extremely high B12, so Ive taken out my morning B-Complex for now to give that time to drop and see if that was contributing to my spike. It may have caused the loose bowel motions, which in turn has seen my kidney function EGFR drop from 89-68. The doc thinks its the loss of the water in my system so just need to keep up my fluids and look for kidney damage signs.
I see the surgeon one week Monday so should have some answers about what next for my vascular system. Its only a 30 min appointment so Im expecting him to either allocate a few more tests my way or try and dismiss my symptoms and tell me its no major and to just carry on.
Carry on restricting? carry on losing weight? It was scary getting down to 45kgs but I felt so good? Its a slippery slope I've slid down before and I know I'll slide down again, and I'm worried this time I would let it consume me. To be honest it's a constant daily battle that no-one quite understands... unless they understand of course. I'm thankful to have a few of those people to talk to if needed as its a really lonely journey... but there is always a positive, a light. Mine is I feel good enough to play with the kids, to exercise, to stay awake long enough to get my jobs done... to have the energy to work a 40 hour week.
Thank goodness for E028's right now, thank goodness my dietician heard me, truly heard me this time...I'm not sure I would be around long without them.
